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dragonfly
31-10-2005, 02:00 PM
# Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?
# Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough in the bank?
# Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
# Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
# Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
# Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
# Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
# Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
# Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
# What is the speed of darkness?
# Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?
# If you send someone 'Styrofoam', how do you pack it?
# If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
# If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
# If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?
# Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?
# Can you cry under water?
# What level of importance must a person have , before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
# If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
# Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
# How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on bigger suitcases ?
# Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up about every couple hours?
# If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
# Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
# Why do doctors, when they ask you to strip, leave the room or close the cubicle curtain while you change? ..... They're still going to see you naked anyway.
# If someone with a split personality threatens to commit suicide, is it a hostage situation?

gixer400
31-10-2005, 04:07 PM
haha. why oh why. i know the one about the kamikazee pilots. they wear a helmet because thats where the easrphone is to recieve their orders.

Biker Dude
31-10-2005, 05:01 PM
# What is the speed of darkness?


# Can you cry under water?


# If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?


darkness is not a thing to be measured... everything is dark unles light is shead. The only way to measure it would be the rate at which darkness dissapears...


You can cry under water...if you have goggles or a mask on...


Yes still called a hearing because all the evidance for and against is heard by the jury, which is why you don't have to be present for it...


Ok, i'm done being clever and pedantic now :lol:

Leo
31-10-2005, 06:31 PM
I was sent an email a little while ago answering all them. I'll try and dig it out