MickyGixer
16-08-2006, 11:45 PM
London 16th August 2006 - A public school teacher was arrested today at Gatwick
Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler,
a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Home Secretary John Reid said he believes
the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not
identify the man, who has been charged by the Met Police with carrying
weapons of maths instruction. "Al-gebra is a problem for us," Reid said.
"They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on
tangents in a search of absolute values. They use secret code names like
'x` and `y` and refer to themselves as `unknowns,` but we have determined
they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with
co-ordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to
say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle".
When asked to comment on the arrest, Prime Minister Tony Blair, speaking
from his holiday resort before the planes stopped flying, said, "If God
had wanted us to have better Weapons of Maths Instruction, He would
have given us more fingers and toes."
Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler,
a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Home Secretary John Reid said he believes
the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not
identify the man, who has been charged by the Met Police with carrying
weapons of maths instruction. "Al-gebra is a problem for us," Reid said.
"They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on
tangents in a search of absolute values. They use secret code names like
'x` and `y` and refer to themselves as `unknowns,` but we have determined
they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with
co-ordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to
say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle".
When asked to comment on the arrest, Prime Minister Tony Blair, speaking
from his holiday resort before the planes stopped flying, said, "If God
had wanted us to have better Weapons of Maths Instruction, He would
have given us more fingers and toes."