Lateshift
28-02-2007, 06:17 PM
In other news today London received some of the heaviest rain it has seen in recent months, and as motorists underwent their daily pilgrimage into the city, those on the A2 travelling past Bexleyheath into London sat in awe as they witnessed what can only be described as a new weather phenomenon.
Weather officials had correctly forecast a severe amount of water due to fall on Englands capital but none could have predicted that such a volume of rain water could produce a land based tidal wave.
One passer by was quoted as saying "it was like something out of Day after tomorrow" whilst others were heard to be muttering some sort of religious expletive (which apparently sounded like "roly muck").
However we were lucky enough to catch up with one commuter who did not wish to remain nameless and he willingly told us that he goes by the name of Lateshift, his account describes best the force of nature and the effect it can have.
"Well there i was doing my thing, still bleary eyed at around 8.15am, trying my best to concentrate my attention to the road in front whilst maintaining a steady pace through the appalling weather conditions, and then i saw it,
It was like a thing of beauty looming out of the daybreak, i had seen images of these things on TV but always wondered just what it would be like to see one in real life.
It wasnt until i realised the impending danger of the situation that all thoughts of how incredible this sight was quickly turned to something that had my arse (am i allowed to say that on air?) yes had my arse twitching like a rabbits nose. The sheer size of the wave coming towards me soon put things into perspective, it must have been around 25ft high, you know the type of wave that everyone sees at the end of the log flume and dares to stand under, but you wouldnt want it coming at you at 70mph!
Army training kicked in and i did what needed to be done, i closed my eyes, muttered something like mmfkinelp (which on reflection i think i was asking my mum for inspiration), all of the time using the apparatus that i carry at the top of my legs to effect at least 6 points of contact with the bike (although in reality i think at the point of impact we had merged anyway).
I pictured the little fat geezer on Days of Thunder, you know the silly sod that is sat on the pit wall saying "its okay Cole just drive through it" and said this is it, lets go for it (i think i had blinked at this point, yes i clearly remember blinking as i remember seeing the wave about to hit me).
Anyway the plan is in action, all in split second timing and i was lurched ready for impact, it wasnt going to take me alive but it was going to be messy, and in we went, the growl of the ZXR400 being drowned out by the howl of the wave looming down over me,
It was at this point that i realised it wasnt mother nature screaming at me, it was the horn from an LGV frantically urging the wave to come and eat me as it pushed the water from the other carriageway over my lane, a cackle could be heard from the driver as he sped past at what must have been an "I've got no brakes" sort of speed.
The wave hit hard and i took the full force before all went quiet, thoughts of death and destruction washed through my head until i realised i had left my visor open and had taken a face full of what the world had decided to throw at me.
I emerged from the other side and in my joy for having fought the wave and won, from that moment on i made it my mission to enlighten the truck driving community that a bike is not a raft and the A2 is a road and not the rapids, and driving like lunatics, through a road flooded with 3ft of water isnt big isnt clever and is likely to get your nose broken, your house burnt down and your dog humped if i ever catch you".
And so back to Kate Adie and some more interesting news :D (some old bearded female news reported that scared the crap out of most soldiers for those too young to know :D )
Lateshift, of the drownt rat variety :D
Weather officials had correctly forecast a severe amount of water due to fall on Englands capital but none could have predicted that such a volume of rain water could produce a land based tidal wave.
One passer by was quoted as saying "it was like something out of Day after tomorrow" whilst others were heard to be muttering some sort of religious expletive (which apparently sounded like "roly muck").
However we were lucky enough to catch up with one commuter who did not wish to remain nameless and he willingly told us that he goes by the name of Lateshift, his account describes best the force of nature and the effect it can have.
"Well there i was doing my thing, still bleary eyed at around 8.15am, trying my best to concentrate my attention to the road in front whilst maintaining a steady pace through the appalling weather conditions, and then i saw it,
It was like a thing of beauty looming out of the daybreak, i had seen images of these things on TV but always wondered just what it would be like to see one in real life.
It wasnt until i realised the impending danger of the situation that all thoughts of how incredible this sight was quickly turned to something that had my arse (am i allowed to say that on air?) yes had my arse twitching like a rabbits nose. The sheer size of the wave coming towards me soon put things into perspective, it must have been around 25ft high, you know the type of wave that everyone sees at the end of the log flume and dares to stand under, but you wouldnt want it coming at you at 70mph!
Army training kicked in and i did what needed to be done, i closed my eyes, muttered something like mmfkinelp (which on reflection i think i was asking my mum for inspiration), all of the time using the apparatus that i carry at the top of my legs to effect at least 6 points of contact with the bike (although in reality i think at the point of impact we had merged anyway).
I pictured the little fat geezer on Days of Thunder, you know the silly sod that is sat on the pit wall saying "its okay Cole just drive through it" and said this is it, lets go for it (i think i had blinked at this point, yes i clearly remember blinking as i remember seeing the wave about to hit me).
Anyway the plan is in action, all in split second timing and i was lurched ready for impact, it wasnt going to take me alive but it was going to be messy, and in we went, the growl of the ZXR400 being drowned out by the howl of the wave looming down over me,
It was at this point that i realised it wasnt mother nature screaming at me, it was the horn from an LGV frantically urging the wave to come and eat me as it pushed the water from the other carriageway over my lane, a cackle could be heard from the driver as he sped past at what must have been an "I've got no brakes" sort of speed.
The wave hit hard and i took the full force before all went quiet, thoughts of death and destruction washed through my head until i realised i had left my visor open and had taken a face full of what the world had decided to throw at me.
I emerged from the other side and in my joy for having fought the wave and won, from that moment on i made it my mission to enlighten the truck driving community that a bike is not a raft and the A2 is a road and not the rapids, and driving like lunatics, through a road flooded with 3ft of water isnt big isnt clever and is likely to get your nose broken, your house burnt down and your dog humped if i ever catch you".
And so back to Kate Adie and some more interesting news :D (some old bearded female news reported that scared the crap out of most soldiers for those too young to know :D )
Lateshift, of the drownt rat variety :D